Make New Friends, but Keep the Old

Laa....la la la...laaa....LAA...!!!

I am so bored.

Now is already 4:47 pm in Singapore.

I am STILL waiting for my friend to call me as we are suppose to make a trip to Ikea to make some purchases for the house.

Today is lucky for me coz this friend of mine is extremely busy. All her days are usually filled up with appointments with other friends and boyfriend.

Most of my friends around my age (btw I am already 27), are already married or attached with a guy. From then on, many will have vanished from my life.

For the rest who are still single, they are usually slogging in the office, or happily partying with their new friends.

I believe most of you should have encountered similar situations like me.

When you are in school, your friends and you are the best of friends. Upon graduation, they will disappear from your life.

Soon they will make excuses of not being able to meet up, or that they have already make appointments with their boyfriend when only 2 days ago they complained of not having enough time to rest and want to stay home.

I have a friend who is so sticky to her boyfriend that the only time I get to see her is when the boyfriend has broken up with her, and she has come sobbing back to me. But once she is attached to another new guy, she will start her disappearing act again.

Some will continue to vanish till the time they are getting married, and the next thing you know is the big red bomb (wedding card) being shoved up your face at the class gathering.

Just few weeks ago, an ancient ex-classmate called me.

"..hello.. this is peggy.."

Immediately the big question mark appears inside my brain. Peggy? Peggy who?

After a while, I realized it was another old classmate from long, long time ago calling me up and inviting me to her wedding.

I was feeling puzzled. This was a classmate I seldom talk to in school, and we do not contact each other upon graduation.

I can't help but felt that the invitation was extended to me coz many people were unable to turn up last minute and want me to fill in the space?

Or that she has reserved too many tables and realized she does not have enough guests to fill up the seats?

I am definitely not going to waste time spending 2 hours stuck in the dinner, sitting with people whom I do not know and have to pretend to engage in an interesting conversation, talking about on how the groom met the bride and so on...

Neither am I going to spend money on the ang bao as I felt I will rather spend it on friends who better deserve my blessings.

Unfortunately, such things are often inevitable in our lives.

As we grow older, each of us has our own commitments and new piorities. Many times, we take the people and things around us for granted.

I remembered when I was young, before we graduated, we will often passed an autographed book among friends to ask them pen down little wishes so that we can remember them years later.

'make new friends, but keep the old. one is silver, the other is gold.'

This was a poem that was often being written in many of our autographs.

However, as the years passed, we met new people in our lives and forgotten those who have once accompanied us and walked with us through an important part of our lives.

Even our close friends, who once treated you as someone very important in their lives, will soon shelved you out of their lives due to new commitments.

Just few months ago, I have asked a close gal friend to travel overseas with me as I have no one to travel with, and it will be dangerous to wander alone in china.

She has to turn me down due to over expenditure during her honeymoon. Strangely though, about a month later, she was now on another tour with her hubby.

Another close friend who has always make excuses for not being able to travel with the group overseas due to tight budgets and schedules, has also make a sudden and far trip abroad.

I do not mean they have to make lots of their time for me. If they are unable to meet for a good reason, by all means I encourage them to do what is the most appropriate for them.

However, I cannot help but feel that whatever they are doing later contradicted to the reasons they have given earlier.

So have they also forgotten their old friends after meeting new people?

Have they forgotten how their friends used to lend their shoulders for them to lean on after walking out of a bad relationship?

This reminded me of an old friend who has once wanted to attempt suicide after a bad break up.

After endless searching and phone calls made, she was finally found, safe and sound. At that point of time she was extremely thankful and we are, of course, the best of the bestest friends.

Few months later, after finding a new guy, she was disappear from my life forever.

Great.

Maybe it was fate that I seems to have meet many wrong or bad friends in my life, on top of the screamings thrown at me by a few, and I really mean SCREAMINGs.

Or perhaps this is a part of our lives.

I was always been told that friends are like passing clouds. They will move in and out of your life easily.

I do not want to believe totally what has been drilled into me since young, as I still have this tiny and shimmering hope that not all human beings will be so ungrateful.

Yet many a times I have been failed.

Or perhaps, this is human nature. To do things only for ourselves and not spare a thought for people around us.

To discard once it is no longer of use to us.

In my younger days, I used to make an attempt to call up my friends whom I have lost contact for some time. After years of doing it, I finally has to resign to the fact that I was actually the only one making the efforts.

Soon I gave up too.

Friendship also needs two hands to clap to substain it. One person cannot do all the work.

Today, I still call up some of my friends whom we have lost contact for some time, but the frequency is lower now.

Now that I mention, I just remembered that there are some friends whom I have not been contacting for some time.

Will go and drop them a mail now.

So have you been replying to your friends' mails? A short message is better than nothing.

If you have nothing to say to them, you can try forwarding mails. At least it shows you still remember them.

And have you been calling up some of your friends recently?

If not, time to catch up now.

Chloe

Have a Happy 2005

2004 came and passed.

Just a few years ago, we were fussing over the new millennium and the y2k bug. Now we have stepped into 2005.

2004 has been an interesting year for me. Meet lots of new people. Make lots of new attempts in life. Lots of 'first time'. Partying alot (thanks to my colleagues). Many more weddings and newborns. It was an eventful year for me.

Last year has been quite an experience. I have learnt alot. Some lessons are hard. Some are interesting. It has been a good and bad year at the same time. hmm... ironic.

At the turn of the new year, most people will have already make new resolutions. So have you make yours already?

For me, I did not make any this year, coz either I never work towards it, or it will never happen.

Sounds defeating? but I feel it is more of not giving myself too much hope and expectations. Take things as they come. If they never come, at least the disappointment is reduced as I did not hope for it in the first place.

The end of 2004 has closed with sadness due to the tsunami disaster.

The start of 2005 has been the world helping the victims of the tsunami.

Mine has been quite peaceful, except with some disturbing decisions that I may have made wrongly last year, that still leave me searching for an answer now. I hope I am not being penalised for it.

And the start of the year already has a shocking news in stored for me.

In the middle of one night last week, I was woken by an sms from my phone. Feeling puzzled, I crawled out of my warm and comfortable bed, thinking that it must be a delayed sms, as not many of my friends will sms me in middle of the night, and my current work scope no longer need me to be on 24 hours standby anymore.

'... jean fainted on the bus this eve... did scan and found a tumor ... '.

I was jolted awake immediately. No.. not again... not another one.

2 years ago, I have lost a friend in a tragic mrt accident. Same age as me, young and happily married. Now, not another one. Though tumor may not necessary be malignant, but the sound of it is disturbing. very disturbing.

Later in the day, I gave her a visit at SGH. The moment I stepped into her ward, she was sitting up, giving me a weak and awkward smile. Then she broke into a wider grin, showing me the missing tooth. God... the fall from the faint or the fits she had has knocked out one of her incisors.

Seeing her putting on a brave smile and trying very hard to look nonchalant, my heart just went out to her.

This is a friend whom I have known for years, in fact for a decade. We have been through college together. Crying over guys together. Hugging and jumping together when we received our A' levels results. Watching her getting married last year... and yes... getting married last year.

She has just embarked on a new journey in life and now this...

After giving her a good hug and a pat on her shoulders, she disclosed that the results of the scan would not be out till next week. In the meantime, we can do nothing but wait. yes... wait.

So much so for the start of the new year. I have received some good news, some bad ones. What about you?

The end of 2004 has been wonderful for me. Well... at least the last day of the year, I get to spend time with a close friend and welcome a new year ahead of us together. Not bad for the turn of the new year, though the day has ended in sadness for me.

Now we are into the 21th day of the new year. Ironically, I have already looked forward to the end of 2005. By then, some matters in my life should already have a conclusion, or perhaps, I need not even have to wait till the end of the year to find out then.

I will face many more challenges in the year ahead of me. What about you?

Happy or sad, smooth sailing or tough.

I wish my family and friends to have a fantastic year ahead, that they will be healthy and their lives be filled with lots of happiness and surprises.

For people whom I know were looking for new opportunities in life, may their wishes be fufilled this year.

For friends who are trying new, risky attempts in life, I encourage them to go all out to do it and give them my full support. After all, a close friends once said to me, ' ... try if you want. at least even if it fails, you know you have tried and will not have any regrets...'

No matter how the year will turn out to be for them (well.. the forecast for me for coming lunar new year is bad), at least have a safe 2005.

For my friend who is sick, I pray for her that the result will bring us good news.

For passersby who has happened to stumbled upon this page, have a happy and healthy year in 2005.

Chloe

Otherwise Known as the ...

Age must have been catching up on me for the last few years.

Gone are the days that I find shopping as something that I love to do, well, at least most gals or women still do.

A few games at the tennis court will make me panting inside out.

Television can no longer hold my attention for long, while in my younger days, I can watch one program after another for hours, from morning till night. My parents must have forked out lots of money to pay for the electricity bills then.

Clubbing seems to be tiring for me rather than relaxation after a hard day of work.

Finally not knowing what to do, or too tired to do, or too bored after doing it so many times, I decided to have my first blogger. I resort to writing, well, after all, it seems simple as only my fingers are moving =P

I was surprise that I actually read up some of my friends' blogger, and even bloggers belonging to people not known to me.

I must be really bored, but no offense pls. Not that they are lousy writers, but since young I have only enjoyed reading novels.

It was even more surprising that I actually wanted to start one on my own. As some people may put it, it is otherwise known as the 'having finished your meal, you have nothing better to do..' thing.

My friends will probably be too busy even to sit down to enjoy a nice cup of coffee, let alone blogging. They will be surprise that I will be having this new pastime, as writing has never been a fav chore in my life.

Some friends prefer to write than to talk. For me, being a gal, I will prefer to talk to my friends on phone which is faster and easier, than to type my thoughts down. But as a friend once put it....'To each its own...'.

I am more of a thinking person. There must be too much thoughts that now I have decided to pen them all down. In addition also to spend my time on doing something at night, and perhaps even to provide another simple pleasure for the next person who is bored as me, and was browsing through the web for interesting thoughts and articles.

Being new to blogger and the fussy me, I have spend much time on choosing the title, my blogger name, the format and so on. I even look through many others to get reference, well... I dun want a title that sounds too boring or a name that sounds too silly. I have a really good time looking thru some of the sites I have surfed. Very interesting and funny articles were posted, and I hit upon my fav title that I saw from one of the site... 'The Unbloggable Blog'.

Many different things happened in each and every one of our lives. It is fun reading through other bloggers' sites. I feel like I have been thru a day with them. Reading their articles is like talking to them. Been there when the incident happened. Feel the same way they have felt right there. Learn about the way people lead their lives in other countries. It is like a world tour to me.

At the beginning, I was worried that I have nothing to write. well... now I have written a good 649 words. Not bad for a newcomer. Have wanted to write more but it is too late into the night now. Tomorrow is a long day for me. I have better turn in, or otherwise I will be known as 'chloe the panda' tomorrow. I hope my first blogger has provided some entertainment pleasure for anyone, if there is any at all... hopefully, who has read it.

good night and good morning...

the newly borned blogger